In a shocking turn of events, Pittsburgh Steelers’ head coach, Mike Tomlin, has issued an audacious directive which is sure to set tongues wagging not only in the football world but also in living rooms across America. In a post-practice press conference, Tomlin stated that any player who chooses to kneel during the national anthem is displaying a distinct “hatred for America” and will be shown the exit door immediately.

It all unfolded in the Steelers’ media room, where the atmosphere was charged with anticipation for routine updates on player injuries and game strategies. But what followed was far from routine. With an uncharacteristic fervor, Tomlin took to the podium, “I’ve made a decision. And I expect everyone on my team to respect it. If you kneel, in my eyes, you’re turning your back on America. And there’s no place for that kind of sentiment in this locker room.”

This proclamation left the room in stunned silence.